A dream to remember, 2010

The dream: I was standing in the middle of the street. The city was dark. I was naked. The buildings were standing all around me like clone giants. In the night sky, several meters above my head, floated the boat. Its dark wood remain in the shadows while inside grew a tall and bright city. Illuminated by it self, the buildings had a colonial architecture in bright yellows. From it came the music of a thousand bands and a thousand songs. Then I recognized it. It was the old city of San Juan.

When I painted “El sueño del recuerdo” in 2011, I decided that I wanted to represent my healing process. The messenger floats with a branch of the cundeamor (Momordica charantia) flower. Many years before, when I was a little girl playing in the back yard of our house, my mother showed me how to eat the seeds of the cundeamor. Only many years after I learned that this magical plant of my childhood was a medicinal plant. But to me the true medicine was in a single memory: my mother standing next to a fence covered in the twisted branches of the cundeamor plant. She lowered her hand and in her thin fingers opened the yellow oblong shape which contained bright red seeds. She said: Don’t chew them, just lick them and spit them.

 

 

Sueño: The dreaming journey, 2009

I always wanted to live in the old district of San Juan, capital of Puerto Rico. I used to imagine that to live there was like having the mark of a real portorrican city slicker aware of her cultural heritage. Finally, being a university student, I had the opportunity. I moved to a big apartment together with three colleages. Back then I used to work close to my apartment. During the first weeks I couldn’t believe my luck and after work, as I was walking back to my apartment, I used to observe its colonial architecture in bright pink color and its arch windows. I believed I would live in that city forever. When I painted “Sueño”, years later in 2010 and now living in Hamburg, I represented the things projected daily in my mind. Back then I still used to cry the memory of the things that I left behind. The elements on this painting not only romanticize the past that for years I wanted to abandon, but also idealize the journey of the immigrant and the new reality that I choose: a new city, a husband and the hands full of the dreams that I long to achieve. By my side, floats the silent messenger of hope; a fish-bird that brings on its beak the blue ribbon symbol of the Vishuddha chakra*. In this way the messenger suggests a future bond to my voice.

 

*Symbolizes the pure consciousness and creativity, it governs expression, inspiration in speech, eloquence, and perception of the archetypal models.